Alone

Have you ever been alone? I guess the better question would be, have you ever felt alone? I feel alone almost all the time and I really don’t like it. When I talk about feeling alone I mean in those times of your life when you are stressed or feel abandoned or you are just struggling.
Now I’m not talking about being alone. I believe that being alone is good for you. As long as you aren’t always alone. Sometimes we need to be alone wether we are having a hard time with others or we are creating art or just thinking about life. Other times being alone can cause us to feel alone and feeling alone is ok like never. I’ve never met someone who enjoys feeling alone. I understand how it feels to feel alone.
It began in California when I started getting home-schooled. I remember always wanting to be in school with someone other than my mom or my siblings. It’s not that I don’t love my family, it’s that I didn’t have a lot of friends when I was younger. A lot of my friends had moved to other states, constantly had family events or just didn’t want to hang out with me which was extremely common in my case. So when I moved from California to Utah, about 4 years ago, I stopped getting home-schooled and I started having more of a social life with Public School. Well not exactly.
School got harder and it was more restricting. I wouldn’t do my homework and because of that, my parents wouldn’t let me hangout with some of the new kids usually. The friends that I did have were pretty nice and fun people. They weren’t all true friends though. So usually I would have a hard time trying to find that one friend who I could be close with.
As I’ve lived in Utah longer I have learned to be friendly with others and be the one to try to make a connection with people. That’s who I am. I’m an extrovert. I still can be shy and quiet, but I always want to be making frienships with people, even if I will only know them for 5 minutes of my life. I know that some of you struggle with this and although I’m no expert on this, I understand how you might feel. Don’t worry it’s never the end.

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